Black Cats
by Ziggurat Rolsovitch
Summary: Look, up in the sky… it's a bird! It's a knightmare! It's… Arthur?


Disclamier: Nope. Uh-uh. I don't own this.

Prepare… for my humors muse! This story is not to be taken seriously. It's just a funny oneshot I thought up.  
>Now… the best mecha pilot is not Kallen or Suzaku… it is… ARTHUR! Hehehe.<p>

XxXxX

There was silence and an eerie fog drifted across the grass, hugging it and staying low, parting at the running footsteps of kids running and laughing with flashlights and buckets.

It was Halloween at Ashford, and the moon poked through the clouds ever now and then as they drifted high and out of reach. At least to some…

Nobody knew of the dark lord's plan. It was his time, he would soon rule all! As soon as he got a hold of that mask.

Lelouch and Suzaku were on patrol, keeping a watch out for any trouble. Since at this time kids liked to 'decorate' the academy with toilet paper and eggs.

"This is such a thankless task." Lelouch said in annoyance.

"It's not so bad." Suzaku disagreed. Both froze and jumped when they heard footsteps behind them. They turned the flashlight and it was even scarier then they first thought.

"What the heck? Get that out of my eyes." Kallen said in irritation.

"Oh, Kallen. I'm sorry." Suzaku apologized right away.

"What are you doing out here?" Lelouch asked.

"Looking for Shirley. She said she needed my help with something and then disappeared."

"Why don't we help you find her?" Suzaku offered and Lelouch agreed.

"If you two have time." she said, shrugging.

XxXxX

Back in the club room, C.C had her box of pizza, all set to cut into it, when she spotted Arthur with Lelouch's mask again. She paused mid bite.

_Hmmm… pizza… Arthur… pizza… Arthur… I pick… pizza. _She decided, taking a bite and letting the cat run free.

XxXxX

The group of three were still looking for Shirley… when they heard another odd sound. A noise that seemed familiar… the clipping of a horse's hooves. All three glanced at one another.  
>All of a sudden a flaming pumpkin was launched at them and Suzaku, jumped and kicked it away from them, barely hitting it away in time.<p>

"Hey! What's the big idea? The headless horseman?" Lelouch asked, stepping forward. "Who are you?"

All of a sudden this horseman unbuttoned the top of the outfit and it turned out to be… "Rivalz?" they all shouted. He dismounted the house and rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

"Sorry guys! That was an accident. Lucky Spinzaku was here!"

"Why does everybody call me that?" Suzaku wondered, setting a hand on his chin. There was an old yowling sound then.

"Look, up in the sky… it's a bird, it's a knightmare… it's… Arthur?" Rivalz asked and the cat landed on Suzaku, sinking claws into his arm. Lelouch yelled in horror at the sight. "No… way… Arthur is Zero? Arthur is Zero! No!"

Everybody froze when Arthur jumped down and started to sharpen his claws.

"Yes, you foolish humans! I am the dark lord of all!" Arthur spoke. And the four teens backed away slowly. A nightmare appeared behind him and he jumped into it, activating it. "Flee before me humans! Muhahahaha!"

"Guys… I think we should… RUN!" Lelouch yelled and they took off, and ducked under the overhang before a hand smacked where they had just been.

"Lelouch, what should we do?" Suzaku asked, ready for orders.

"Right… Spinzaku can distract Arthur, while we get Kallen to that nightmare over there." Lelouch said, pointing to the one by the gates.

"Roger." Suzaku said, but paused. "And please don't call me that."

"Got it." Kallen stated.

"What do I do?" Rivalz asked and everybody looked at him.

"You… stay here." Lelouch decided and then everybody split up.

"Awww! No fair. Everybody else gets to do cool stuff." He complained.

"Muhahaha!" Arthur laughed evilly. "Suzaku…the bane of my existence… you are first!" Suzaku managed to distract Arthur, but he ran out of space and prepared to get smashed.

"I don't think so!" Kallen said, blocking the hit.

"WHAT? You human dare defy me?" Arthur asked in outrage. The two battled and Lelouch and Suzaku occasionally had to doge stray blasts, finally Kallen believed she had him… when Arthur suddenly dodged it and made the final blow.

"Kallen!" Lelouch shouted. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, yeah. Can't believe I got beat by a cat."

"Damn!" Lelouch said, he turned to Suzaku. "That it… it's up to you, Suzaku."

"Right." Suzaku said and went to get the nightmare in the basement.

Lelouch yelled and dogged Arthur's blast. He passed out, from the effort. He laid their panting heavily as Suzaku clashed with Arthur.

"Shouldn't have skipped gym." Lelouch said.

"Suzaku! Give up!" Arthur stated. "You cannot win!" he slammed an arm into Suzaku's nightmare, disabling it.

"Agh! But how?" Suzaku wondered.

"I don't believe this? My logic has been outsmarted by a cat?" Lelouch asked, tossing over his eyes in shame.

"Arthur? Why?" Suzaku asked.

"Why? Isn't it obvious? You forgot to feed me again." Arthur laughed manically. "I shall take over the world… and all the tuna of Britannia shall… be… mine! HA! Hahahaha!"

CLICK!

Arthur woke up from his dream to find his master entering the room. He walked over to the cabinet, opened a can of tuna and collapsed onto the couch.

"Meow!" Arthur meowed happily and ran to his tuna. What an odd dream he just had… if only these paws could handle a nightmare… he could rule the world, but for now… Arthur the king of the cat world… would enjoy his tuna.

XxXxX

End

Hahaha. Couldn't resist.

Thanks for reading, leave a review and God Bless.


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